Last Chemo today! It’s true the journey gets easier as time goes by.

TripleTea
TripleTea Member Posts: 59
Well what a whirlwind 5 months. I am 39yrs & was diagnosed with triple neg, grade3 BC in August 17 and had a lumpectomy 3 days after diagnosis with clear margins & 0/4 lymphnodes. I have since has 3 rounds of FEC and 3 rounds of Docetaxel 3weeks apart. Last one this morning! Woo hoo, open the bubbles!!!!

 I remember joining this group in August and being all over the place emotionally. My BC is triple negative which has a higher chance of metastasis in the next 5 years and for the first couple of months it’s all I could think about and focus on. Tears daily and super scared. Couldn’t think about anything in the future without getting upset. Then there’s the  the waiting after surgery for results and then the long wait to see the oncologist and know a real plan. Arrgghhh! 

The ladies on here have been a huge support and while I may not post all the time I am always reading and they are right in saying you feel better once you have a plan in place and also that as you move through the journey you think a little less about it each day(on physically good days anyway). At first it was the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the last thing at night but it is getting better.
 I had 4 sessions with a counseller through cancer council and she really helped my mindset. She said “you can’t change what will happen so why waste good time worrying about what probably won’t happen, you could get killed in a car accident tomorrow but you don’t worry about that everyday”. 

I still I’ll have a long way to go. I am BRCA1 so am having my ovaries out/ full hysterectomy in 3weeks followed by a double mastectomy & expander recon 2weeks after that. It’s safe to say February is going to be a shit month!!  

Dont  get me wrong, I still have my days where I overthink, worry, tears etc but I try to push it aside & focus on the now and not the what if’s. They are much less often than before that’s for sure. @onemargie you tried to tell me it would get easier and at the time I couldn’t see how but you are right. Thanks for all your support! 

One quote from @Afraser that I wrote down early on was “coping with things takes enough energy, don’t waste energy trying to cope with things that haven’t and may not happen. Thanks @Afraser it was a good one!! 

I will I’ll keep you posted on my mastectomy later  just gotta  get through this next shit week of chemo side effects.

xxx

Comments

  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,352
    Well done, lovely post, it's always good to hear how things are going. If any of us have helped you in the smallest way, that's terrific too. Best of luck for February, that won't be much fun but you are a practised hand at all this stuff now, and you know much better how strong you are. We'll be thinking of you, best wishes. 
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
    So happy to hear you are in a better place. 2cyears on and I still have fears and tears every now and then...but mostly I dont. 
  • Mollygirl
    Mollygirl Member Posts: 213
    @TripleTea big huge congrats and well done with a big 'phew' thrown for good measure!  What a milestone. Tick that sucker right off the list. I'm also TNBC grade 3 and had identical chemo to you - holy hell right???!!!! Also no nodes and I've just had bilaterals with no recon ( to chicken to do more). 
    Yes, February will be huge for you - chop it into chunks. Chemo's done, you're a big part of the way there. Biggest hugs, Bec xx