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I was asked "Would you turn back the clock 12 months and not have Cancer"?????

Sam09
Sam09 Member Posts: 149
What a year the past 12 months have been for me and nothing summed it up like this question I was asked yesterday.  I did not even have to think about the answer..... with a diagnosis first of stage one breast cancer to a few months later stage four would I  ????? A question many think about us all with cancer  ... would we like to turn back the clock....... for me I know clearly now NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  In the beginning I was so angry   why me??? A health fanatic slim fit woman.. But a year later I have found myself really I have got to know myself and a stunned friend when I answered her question is what I stared straight back at.  Cancer has been horrible totally unbelievable however it has turned me around in a way I have got to like and made me a person I was not before...  Not a day goes by without appreciating every single little aspect of what life holds . For me its the beauty of the days what is around me and enjoying the things we all take for granted when we assume we have a full life ahead.. I feel so lucky and grateful for having what I have and see clearly now what life is all about. It helped me filter the people in life around me to whom I now realise love me truly and leave behind what makes me unhappy in my life...

I hope with all my heart that I live a long time though statistics tell me the opposite. I will still enjoy my fitness and health as it is all I have control over and thank my cancer for all it has done for me.  Cancer you have made me a better person   a stronger woman and a most humble and grateful human being and that I am thank full  for and hold great gratitude for...




Comments

  • LMK74
    LMK74 Member Posts: 795
    Sam09, you're inspirational in your positive outlook. How did it get from stage 1 to 4 so quickly. I hope you don't mind me asking and sorry if i've upset you. When I read things like this it helps out things in perspective. Good on you and keep smiling.
    Hugs Lisa.
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,540
    @Sam09 Your post is beautiful!  Happy to hear you are in a better place, enjoying what matters!  Listen to that music and hum away
    Take care, sending you a virtual hug from Christine xx
  • Hopes_and_Dreams
    Hopes_and_Dreams Member Posts: 760
    @Sam09, thank you for such an honest post.  You are an inspiration and have shown how much strength you have in rising above your diagnosis and embracing life. Wishing you all the best, Jane xx
  • fairydust
    fairydust Member Posts: 290
    @Sam09 I am happy for you and how you are embracing this time in your life. Truly I really mean it  However for me I feel a deep sadness for mankind. I had little knowledge of cancer.. now I know too much.
     My friends and family dynamics have not changed.
     So I strive to be a better person and try to make sense of things that make no sense  Best wishes
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,372
    Good on you, Sam! It hasn't made me a better person, it's just made me grumpier than ever. Which probably would have happened anyway :)
  • Sam09
    Sam09 Member Posts: 149
    Thank you all for your lovely posts! Lisa you have not upset me at all!!!!  I was first diagnosed with stage 2 then as it appeared the mass shrunk so they downgraded it to a stage one. I had a lumpectomy instead of a masectomy as planned and at my six month surgical app my surgeon congratulated me on being cancer free he was fully confident he had got it all and to go home and live my life fully and forget about it... that was on the Monday morning I was elated. On the wednesday I had bloods taken and on the Friday I was sitting with my oncologist being told I had 12 inoperable liver masses..  MMMMM someone got it wrong I feel. At the time of diagnosis a ct scan revealed tiny benign marks on my liver well I fear now they were not the nothing at the time I was told. But nevertheless I am here.

    My daughter read my post and said to me it made it sounded like I embraced cancer and  I had it to thank!  Believe me that is far from the truth. That is not what I mean't.  Zoffel you made me laugh what a gorgeous little post thank you!
    Love and hugz to all my cyber sisters for your kindness. I just love you all..... we are connected in a way which brings us close to each other for comfort and an only we know understanding. We belong to an exclusive little club and I am for one glad to be a member.

  • Brenda5
    Brenda5 Member Posts: 2,423
    I need an Inspirational button in the likes section as Awesome isnt good enough <3
  • Sam09
    Sam09 Member Posts: 149
    Oh Brenda 
    my cup runneth over  :)
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited July 2017
    Great question and lovely answer. I'd still prefer not to have experienced cancer. 
  • Anne94
    Anne94 Member Posts: 162
    Hi @Sam09
    Im so glad that you are feeling great and doing well both emotionally and physically. We do have a lot to be thankful for. It's  been nearly a year since my stage 4 diagnosis. It has changed my life. I am thankful for the support that everybody has given me. My friends and family and the kids schools have rallied around us so much. 
    I'm not overly happy that I have cancer and that it's initial diagnosis was stage 4. I'm not happy that my daughter and son have to worry. 
    I am grateful that we have a fantastic public health system. And I'm thankful that I'm currently well/stable. 
    And im so appreciative of the groups like BCNA. 
    Hugs and love
    Anne 


  • Mira
    Mira Member Posts: 678
    Hi Sam09, I love your attitude!  Having breast cancer was a turning point in making my life better.   I have another illness that I don't talk about often and wasn't getting the help and support that I needed, thanks to my brush with cancer and a social worker I am now in a much better place in life and getting a lot more support.   My life has done a complete turnaround!  I've gone from living with my parents to living independently and having a small p/t job, none of which would have happened if I hadn't found my lump.