Is that right? Did you really say that?

JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
edited February 3 in Day to day
Some weird things people actually say to people that are diagnosed with cancer.

"Don't worry, you have the best cancer there is to get"
"Cancer is a gift"
"Cut out the sugar"
"I know someone who had the same cancer, she died, but I know you will be OK"
"I wouldn't do chemo if I were you"

Anyone else have any comments they have heard, or heard of?  I actually have a laugh when I reflect on some of the ridiculous sentiments cancer patients can be subjected to.


  • LucyELucyE Member Posts: 295
    edited January 13
    All of them! Also:

    “I thought my life was bad, but look at your situation!”

    ”My prognosis is not as bad as yours.”
    The comments about knowing people who had died were common. The chemo one cropped up a lot. 

    A nurse who on my first day of chemo told me that because I had to reschedule due to cold caps “We are very busy and you are holding us up from getting home.”

    Mostly people mean well. I’ve learned to tune out. These days people don’t even ask how I’m doing. I prefer that. 

  • JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
    Person supporting me to my first chemo round on the way there tells me ..... "I am not sure how strong my stomach will be, I may have to leave the room"
    Thinking to myself...... are you serious, you are telling me this as I sit here in the car with you freaking out about it myself.  


  • MiraMira I live in my computer .... Member Posts: 311
    "I can tell whoever I want" (when they know you are trying to keep it private)
  • JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
    Me: I have been diagnosed with breast cancer.
    Person: Sorry to hear that!  You just don't know what is around the corner, we may not be here next year. I am now going to plan that holiday I was thinking of having next year, I will plan it for this year now.  I may not be here next year.

  • SisterSister Adelaide Hills, SAMember Posts: 324
    Best one I've had so far was the nurse in the holding area before I was wheeled into theatre telling me that one of her colleagues had BC and recently died.
  • JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
    @Sister... I hope you consoled the nurse (joking)   :D :D
  • SisterSister Adelaide Hills, SAMember Posts: 324
    I should say that every other staff member at the hospital was great and very sensitive.  (I had the same nurse before theatre the second time round and this time she didn't say anything.)  I have to say that my disbelief in what I was hearing distracted me from the panic I was feeling at the time. :D
  • JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
    @Sister I also think the distraction is ok, as we have to really focus on what is coming out of their mouth, and processing that information in a way as to not take it personally. Broadens our shoulders somewhat. 
  • JoannieJoannie Member Posts: 337
    edited January 14
    @Sister do you mean the second time around that no more of her colleagues had died since your first surgery? :D
  • LucyELucyE Member Posts: 295
    A friend of mine has recently been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease and one of his colleagues told him he eats like a crab. :(
  • Summerhill38Summerhill38 VictoriaMember Posts: 698
    I just love when the nurse in theatre says to you "Hi, how are you today ?"   Well, "fucking great" I feel like answering as they are about to chop my boob off - but no, I said ""well, I am here - what do you think ? .....!".
  • Me2Me2 Member Posts: 12
    Oh dear, I think we are all in the same boat. Another one of my favourites I always get is ....."but you look so well"

    I've always felt if you have nothing positive to say, say nothing. Oh and..... when being as hairless as a lab rat, wearing a headscarf the best was.............Gee the scarves suit you.....probably cause you had short hair anyway you don't miss your hair!!!!!   Oh and one more.....the grizzly expression when anyone spotted my radiation burn...(I was burnt way up to under my chin almost so concealment was difficult), got lots of tips for sunburn creams and slip slop slap routines, I know how I would like to slap, but working with public you learn to just smile, walk away, then go out the back and SCREAM! lol
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