Returning to work

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24

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  • Cook65
    Cook65 Member Posts: 733
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    Hi Kath,
    I worked part time throughout chemo and found that it was to my detriment. I finished chemo in October 2014 and I still have times when I do too much that I get hit with the fatigue. I also found lots of people thinking and saying "oh well you've finished chemo, so you'll be right now". I still had 33 radiotherapy sessions to go and 7 months of herceptin to go. My onc told me that it could take up to 2 years to recover from treatment and I'm certainly finding this to be true. I explained it to my family that it wasn't just tired but it was overwhelming exhaustion and no matter how much I slept it made no difference. I think once your hair grows back, people find it difficult to relate that you are a cancer patient. I have a dear friend who is stage 4 and people don't believe her when she tells them she has stage 4 cancer because she looks too well! You need to do what's right for you. If you need extra time then take it. My employer struggled with the fact that I no longer did long hours and the like and they ended up sacking me because I wasn't working like I did before. Like you I will never work to breaking point again. I'm believe that it had an impact on getting cancer in the first place. Take care of yourself. Others don't get it because they haven't been there. Wishing you well. Karen xox
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
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    @Cook65 Thankyou. ❤
  • InkPetal
    InkPetal Member Posts: 499
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    This idea that mental and physical health aren't connected needs to get in the bin. We have 100 million neurons in our dang guts alone, it's not like our brains live in glass jars somewhere.  :'(
  • Cate64
    Cate64 Member Posts: 446
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    You know, you might benefit from going into work for short amounts of time so your mind will be occupied on something else.

    I managed to continue to work full time thru Chemo & continue on with parkrun (running 5km each Saturday), I was lucky - & stubborn!!.

    I completely understand it affects us all differently but I found personally, working & keeping my mind occupied with something else other than the cancer & treatment was beneficial to me.

    I hope you are feel better & stronger as each day passes.

    Cate


  • melclarity
    melclarity Member Posts: 3,502
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    Kath, I absolutely feel its based on what you do for work and how you physically have been through treatment and currently. All of these things dictate for you personally on what you feel you should do, just remember put you first. Work is work, I learnt the hard way, I was incredibly ill through Chemo and couldnt work let alone function in any capacity, I was devastated not being able to work. Seems the universe had other ideas. Work can be a nice distraction but again depending on how demanding it is. Im lucky Ive managed 3 days a week 9 months on...BUT...because of the nature of my job my Occ. Therapist has said ENOUGH! I am not fit in any capacity to continue in fact work has now become detrimental. So its a fine line and balance. I thought I had it with working 3 days, but things have proven wrong and it does sadden me. So time to put me above work completely, plus my job is violent and having lumbar stenosis and osteoporosis now in my spine I am sooo wary of that job. Time for change but first ME...

    Put you first however that looks for you...xo Melinda
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
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    @melclarity Yes I do agree. I've  always taken on a lot when I do work and know I am not presently up to it, just managing my basic home stuff is s struggle. I also work in mental health and quite frankly don't  have the mental energy to deal with this aspect either. It's  not a job you can half do. I too had hoped to work through chemo and became very stressed and felt very guilty when I couldn't. Whilst stories of the lucky ones who breezed through chemo ...great for them...doesn't  make  life for us who can't any easier. I hope to return next month on 4 hours a day and see how it goes. Thanks for the support. 
  • melclarity
    melclarity Member Posts: 3,502
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    Kath, 

    I know exactly what youre saying, it was so tough when I had to admit I couldnt return last year, I felt defeated in so many ways. Ive always been a workaholic and my work is physical, but its also extremely mentally demanding with Autistic Children. I completely agree with what you are saying, I think also a gradual return leads to success. Give it a go and just know its OK however it works out. Its been a tough one I have found in being so conscientious, never having time off, but I do not put work above myself anymore...I need to heal more before I can give to my job the way I love to. I also have no support and 2 teenage children so juggling it all has proven too much. It was a much needed conversation with my Occ. Therapist today who really put my work into perspective but most importantly, put what Ive been through in perspective. It doesnt matter how strong you are, we forget to look at ourselves that way, we get lost in the journey. So its a nice reminder to say "Hey!!! I did all that and be proud...so be super kind to you, go slow and before you know it you'll be in full capacity and kicking butt...happy and healthy!!! :) hugs
    Melinda
  • InkPetal
    InkPetal Member Posts: 499
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    @melclarity @primek I'm proud of you <3 It makes me a little sad though, because the thought that some people don't have these choices, don't have the stability or support network to be able to cut down the workload or take the time or change jobs, always creeps back into my head. Imagining having to deal with all that added stress on top of everything makes my heart so heavy. I'm in awe of both of you.
  • Nadi
    Nadi Member Posts: 619
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    Hi Kath, when I complained about my fatigue to my oncologist his idea was to send me for a brain scan because in his opinion I had finished chemo and radiation and should be on the road to recovery by now and the Herceptin doesn't cause fatigue! Of course the MRI of my brain was normal. I've been doing the gym and exercise for 8 weeks now but I still have the fatigue. Constant pain also takes it out of me. I ended up asking to see a psychiatrist as I wanted to rule out depression. I saw one that specialises in breast cancer. I told her I was struggling with 15 hours a week and to my surprise she told me that even that was too much. She also told me I am not depressed but that I am drained of all my energy reserves just like a phone battery. She was the first doctor I have encountered who actually 'got it'. She told me to take time off, she'd even give me a letter for 6 months leave, which I would love to do but money is tight so I can't. Hubby and I are seriously thinking about redrawing on our home loan so we can have a break. He's exhausted too just in another way. The psychiatrist also made me think about the fact that there's a higher chance of HER2 positive coming back within the first 2 years and we need to be strong in case we are hit with it again otherwise it's going to be harder to cope with chemo the second time around. I am now thinking that if I take time off now I can always work a few months longer at the end of my career (can't wait until I hit preservation age at 60) to make up the difference. Also, I used to really love work, but because I am struggling so much I don't anymore. I don't want it to be that way, so maybe a break would help me regain my love for it. It's still hard to know what to do, but if I could wind back the clock to last October when I was diagnosed then I would definitely take a year off.

    Hugs  :)  Nadine
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,552
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    Hi Nadi - please look at Otis Foundation http://www.otisfoundation.org.au/
    it is free, they are Australia wide and it will be a break that will help you to find yourself a little, time out without the worry of work, medical appointments or the cost of the holiday..  I was teary some of my time at the retreat but more so because my head was in the space of feeling grateful, feeling guilty for accepting a free holiday and so thrilled that lovely people are willing to offer their properties for us to stay in.  It gave me an opportunity to be teary about being grateful rather than teary about another damned medical appointment.  The property we stayed at was for 6 nights.
    It's good for the soul and yes the fatigue is still with you but when you have a break away from the routine of life it gives you the opportunity to accept and roll with it rather than fight it  
    Take care and sending you a virtual hug from Christine xx

  • melclarity
    melclarity Member Posts: 3,502
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    @nadi thanks for sharing! 

    I have to say I totally agree with everything you said. In hindsight now I should have not returned to work, part of me wanted to feel normal again, but it has proven detrimental now. So time to reassess. Hardest thing is getting someone who 'Gets it' so its hard to talk to anyone, family or friends as they don't get it and have this expectation you are back to normal...so I find Im battling in silence and unsupported. Thankfully talking to my Occupational Therapist yesterday at the Epworth Hospital where I did an 8 week rehab program was fantastic, cleared the fog and gave me direction on how to approach things and my Oncologist...and is willing to step in and deal with him LOL. 
  • Johnann
    Johnann Member Posts: 29
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    I'm sorry to hear these stories, however, I feel I'm not alone. I went back to work 2 months after radiation treatment (I also went through chemo and was hospitalised twice) I had this amazing supervisor who welcomed me back and set appropriate support for me during the times I wasn't at work. Unfortunately, she was acting and in April I got a new boss. This boss is nice but isn't understanding my gradual return to work. In fact I have now reduced my hours as I'm just exhausted. I try to do what I can but I'm definitely not as fast as I was pre cancer. He thinks I'm working a kind of part time and doesn't quite get that when I've completed my hours I need to go. I walk into work with a smile on my face which I think makes it hard and he thinks I can do everything he throws at me. In fact since his arrival in April he has never asked how I'm coping and I've tried to soldier on. Well, it's me first now and as my psychologist says 'not at my expense'. thinking of you all xxxxx
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
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    @Johnann . I have found  since returning as I look so good they do not realise how tired you get. I am doing 4 hours a day...then need a solid 1 hour sleep obce home.   At least now I feel refreshed after that and can get up and do other things. The tiredness is the hidden side of cancer treatment. Others just don't get it.
  • Ro10
    Ro10 Member Posts: 59
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    Hi @primek Its funny how people think you will be feeling great after essentially having poison pumped into your veins for 6 months! I would think it would take at least 6-12 months minimum for your body to recover from something like that. Unfortunately I'm just at the start of my treatment so I have all that to look forward to at the end!  Would you consider seeing a naturopath who may be able to give you some supplements to help your body recover and repair itself? My naturopath has supported quite a few people through chemo and she has had good feedback from them about their recovery times and general health and wellbeing. I know it's not a magic cure and it's not for everyone but it won't do any harm. She also said that a few of her post-chemo clients follow a ketogenic diet and have had good results in terms of their health and energy levels. Again, it's not a magic cure and may be hard for some people to stick to but maybe worth looking into.
  • melclarity
    melclarity Member Posts: 3,502
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    @ Ro10, you are right, I was told it takes a minimum of 12 months to recover from Chemo. Im 10 months post and still have a long way to go. I work 3 days and have had to concede to another year of reduced work capacity which is disheartening, its a very long road of recovery and NOBODY gets it. Best thing I did was see a Kinesiologist, this is the ONLY thing that is helping with my recovery. I take Magnesium as thats one of the most important things to be taking as it services something like over 300 enzymes in the body. So its super beneficial. I still have trouble walking, fatigue is bad too, exercising has proven impossible with no time and being a single parent. So its really just a day at a time, and everything is now on my terms LOL Definitely alot of things can help though, I eat well but rest is imperative.